A kick

I'm 15 weeks and 5 days pregnant today and I'm almost 100% sure I felt a little kick. Actually it felt more like something did a little somersault just where we've been hearing the heartbeat. It was awesome.

I've felt little flutters before now, but nothing quite as distinct as today's.

Baby's Heartbeat

After a couple of week's of anxiety over a distinct lack of pregnancy symptoms (no sickness, no obvious bump, no tiredness, no hunger, no more sore boobs, no more acne, etc., etc.) I invested £30 in a fetal doppler (baby heartbeat listener) called AngelSounds.

It arrived this weekend, along with a bottle of ultrasound gel, and boy was it worth the money.

I decided to try it out on my own at first and, try as I might, I couldn't hear anything other than my own heartbeat. Then Robin tried and within 30 seconds he'd picked up the baby's heartbeat. To make sure it WAS the baby's heart we counted the beats - 150 per minute compared to my slow, heavy 75 per minute.

I feel SUCH relief :-)

Even better, you can hear the baby moving around too - it makes a whooshing sound as it does.

Highly recommended.

A bump ... or just too many pies??

15 weeks today.

I can't wait to have an obvious baby bump :-)

Nuchal Results

14 weeks and 1 day today.

Got the results of my Nuchal Translucency test yesterday and the risk of downs is low. 1 in 1,100.

I think I have a little bump starting to appear. I can't imagine it's just me getting fat (although I wouldn't be surprised with the amount of crisps I've eaten this week). It's all in one place just below my belly button and it feels a little bit harder than fat would.

Hurrah. I can't wait to have a proper bump.

Well meaning others ...

I've noticed that people feel the need to warn me about what horrors await: sleepless nights; exhaustion; dirty nappies; messy house; lack of money; loss of identity; blah blah blah ... and that's before they even get to the Hell that is labour and childbirth.

It's so disheartening.

I KNOW it's not going to be a bed of roses. I'd be foolish to think otherwise.

BUT I'm looking forward to having a family of my own; the love that comes from a mother-child bond; the joy that comes from witnessing each and every milestone; the pleasure that comes from seeing him or her smile ...

That's what I CHOOSE to think about right now, because soon enough I'll be finding my own way through motherhood and making my own decisions about what constitutes Hell and what doesn't.

Fear's creeping in ...

So here I am, 13 weeks and 5 days pregnant with all sorts of hazardous thoughts whizzing round my head. Why don't I FEEL pregnant? Has something gone wrong? Am I still pregnant? What if something has happened to the baby? What if I go for my 16 week antenatal appointment in 3 week's time and the midwife can't hear a heartbeat??!

If only I could look inside my tummy and just see that everything is okay, I'd be happy. Or even better, a daily ultrasound. Now THAT would be awesome :-)

I'm guessing these are normal fears for a first-time mom. I can't wait until I've got a bump, then I might feel more relaxed - at least I'll be able to see that the baby is actually growing!

In two day's time, my precious little button will be around 9cm long. Wow.

Scan 12 weeks, 4 days

Last Monday was the second scan and this time round the baby was 'old' enough to have the Nuchal Fold or Nuchal Translucency test (where they measure the width of strip of fluid in the baby's neck). Rob and I had already done some research into this and knew that anything in the region of 3mm could indicate downs. As it turns out, ours measured 1.3mm. I also had bloods taken and haven't heard back from the hospital so I assume the risk is low.

Our appointment was at 9.20, but when I went in for the scan, the baby was fast asleep. My heart skipped a beat when I saw it lying there as still as a stone. I asked the sonographer if she could see a heartbeat - which she could - and whether it was normal for a foetus to lie so still - which it is. To make matters worse, the baby was curled up which meant the first crown to rump measurement was shorter than it should have been.

No amount of prodding and poking could arouse the little button, so I was told to leave the room and walk around for a while to try and wake it up. After twenty minutes of walking, jumping, hip swinging and invisible hula hooping, the baby was awake and an accurate crown to rump measurement of 6.34cm was taken. So all good.

Estimated Date of Delivery (EDD) is 17th December. It seems so far away!!!

I still don't have a bump as such. I just look like I've eaten a few too many pies. And I have no other symptoms apart from a spotty face and sore boobs. Rob is loving the boobs already - this morning he asked how long they'll last after the baby is born, lol.

Tempted fate and bought a little baby toy this week. Have promised it will be the only one until the 20 week scan. Standing at the checkout waiting to pay for the toy I imagined holding my baby for the first time and nearly burst into tears. I must try not to think about these things in public :-)